I was actually more of thot during high school than here at college, I think.

One of those nights where I wish you weren’t in Baltimore doing things bigger than life. None of these B-list chicks compare to you, I swear.

One day.

Bbn. Actually making a serious attempt to be a good person from now on.

My hometown squeeze and my college squeeze followed each other on Twitter, so how long ‘til the shit hits the fan though.

Oh, shut up.

I got stupid drunk tonight. To the point where I didn’t even know what an HDMI cable was and I consider myself to be technologically adept.

ROUND 2 TOMORROW.

Wow, I’m gonna fuck you then never talk to you again.

Is wanting to just have coitus without any obligations such a huge deal, like do you want an engagement ring?

 2
18 Mar 14 at 11 pm
tags: memoirs  thoughts 

I like crazy sex and bacon.

I like you, but I don’t want to like you. Makes sense, I know.

Go away.

But, come back naked.

I embrace the persona of being the bad guy. Of luring girls in with my “sweet side” only to unleash the true demon inside of myself when things get to be too much. I want all of the fun without the commitment. But, in doing so, I usually bring about more conflict than anything.
Recently, I’ve held the belief that investing yourself into someone is symbolic to handing them a loaded gun and placing the barrel right between your eyes. You entrust them to not hurt you, to not bring your walls down and pull the trigger.
But, clinging onto this way of thinking has took its toll when you can’t help but want to jam the gun into someone’s hand. When you feel for them enough to place their finger on the trigger and place the cold steel against your head.
Maybe I’m just being stupid or a turd as you always call me. I feel for you, but I don’t want to. I already broke down my defenses for too long by having you in my mind for such a long time.
Do I try to progress things with you? I feel like I owe it to you even though I made it so apparent that someone else held my attention for a span of time.
I don’t know. I’m torn up. I don’t want to lose you, but I don’t want to lose myself neither.

 1
08 Feb 14 at 11 am
tags: memoirs  thoughts 

Always getting into crazy situations.

So now that football season is over, what do I do with my life?

It’s like I have an underlying, subconscious attraction for sheer craziness and I’m tired of it. I’m tired of dealing with girls who cause my sanity to become more and more diminished.